Dating a friend is widely recognized to be a pursuit fraught with potential complications.
If it works out, great — but if it doesn’t, well, there’s a good chance the friendship won’t survive unscathed.
Ashley: The second time around, after he’d lived in Seattle, he just showed up on my doorstep and kissed me. Also, it really doesn’t say much for platonic friendship if you can only be friends with people you aren’t attracted to.Kelly: The person I want to hang out with most is right next to me when I wake up.Kelly: I believe we handled the evolution of our relationship very consciously.Nothing felt weird to me, but the transitions didn’t just happen on their own.Kelly: We were good ol’ fashion friends from the fall of 2010 to the fall of 2011. Then we were friends with benefits until I moved to Seattle, and then back to just friends until October of 2013.
Ashley: We met in a college class and slowly became friends.
Ashley: We hooked up for a semester in college, then spent about two years being mostly just friends again while he did an internship in NY (I was still based in Indiana) then moved to Seattle.
After a year in Seattle he came back to Indiana to visit, and we decided to try and date for real. Ashley: We talked so much about every decision and all of our feelings so that even when it felt weird, it quickly went back to not feeling weird.
Be prepared for it not to go your way and that being just friends with this person is probably a whole lot better than not knowing them anymore.
Ashley: Take your time with the feeling, and prepare yourself to be extremely vulnerable. Try to know if you can live with that, and if you can’t, be honest about it. He was always the standard against which I measured other men, and we dated a bit when we were younger. I was struck by this visceral sensation, like ‘This is The Point.
Ashley: We met in a seminar that was set up like a production company, and I was his boss. About a year later, after ending a terrible relationship and getting fired from my job, I went to a party at his house.