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"Normally you hear its the woman who is bitter etc etc but from my experience men can souless, heartless and temendously bitter and vengeful.

I've just come to accept it for what it is and as someone said wait for his karma to come round". Why is is that men who leave can turn their emotions OFF about us(except for listening to their emotions about the NEW WOMAN).

We're the person they loved for....years, in my case 20?

My ex has tried to justify his having an affair and leaving us all.

He said firstly if I had made him feel loved he would never have looked at somebody else.

A fellow colleague couldn't believe our boss' wife's behaviour.

But when asked what if his wife had done extractly what our boss and his OW had done, what would you do, he said he would kill her (I don't think he really meant it), but you get the general idea.

When I told him this the other day and that he makes my life harder, he just looked surprised. I suppose you only have to look at most men's attitude to what consistutes "cheating".

They register nothing but their own selfish emotions My ex never thinks that his plans for my DD should be checked with me, shows no respect and makes out he is on a higher moral level because I happened to express some dismay and anger with him (not swearing or anything)whilst he was as cold as ice! He and other ex's I know have been just the same... Whereas most women will think that you've been unfaithful if your partner shares a passionate kiss with someone else, the man in question, as well as most men, will not.

That requires them to be selfish as I guess you couldn't move on to do more sowing if you remained too attached. Alison My ex has tried to justify his having an affair and leaving us all.

I was told not to be so crude and to try and be a better parent to our children.... are you sure my husband and yours arent the same man?

He does not see himself as being unfaithful as he is being faithful to himself and she is the true love he has been waiting for all his life.

Pity he did not tell me this 16 years ago when we got together.

To be honest his attempts at self justification are so pathetic they have given me the first laugh I have had in a long time.